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  • Writer's pictureTaiwana McKinney

Relationship Saboteur



A person who commits sabotage is called a saboteur. To sabotage is to destroy or damage something deliberately and on purpose. It is an act or process with the intent to hamper or hurt (Merriam Webster/Free Dictionary.com). It is designed to stop, prevent, and/or hinder the progression of destinies, dreams, visions, purposes, ministries, and relationships.


The Inherited Saboteur:

When we accept the Lord Jesus into our heart, we inherit an enemy. Our key verse (John 10:10) describes him as a thief and tells us that his intention is to steal, kill, and destroy. He wants to steal our peace and joy, kill our dreams and visions, and destroy our ministries and relationships. It is his duty and purpose to try to sabotage our relationship with the Lord and our relationship with others. He will try any and everything to try to hinder us from cultivating relationship with the Lord. He will try to make us feel as though we are too tired to spend time in the study of the Bible, too busy to pray and communicate with the Lord, disinterested or not seeing the need to fellowship with other believers, and too prideful to offer praise and worship to the Lord. When we fail to do these things, our spiritual walk with the Lord gets weak and our relationship with the Lord will began to diminish. Just like in any relationship, a lack of communication, participation, trust and dedication, the relationship will began to dwindle or die. We have to be aware of those things and people that pull our time away from Him and make every effort to push through the urge to put off our study time, prayer, and praise and worship to Him.

One example from the bible I’d like to share with you concerning sabotage is Nehemiah (see Nehemiah chapters 1-6). When Nehemiah was rebuilding the Jerusalem walls, he had enemies taunting him, threatening him, ridiculing him, and mocking him. They were trying to distract him and make him stop his work/ assignment and come down off the wall but he said no, I am doing a great work; I can’t come down (Nehemiah 6:2-3). He knew he had an assignment and he had to finish it and he was not going to let anyone or anything stop him from doing what God had purposed him to do. This is how we should respond to the distractions and cares of this world (jobs, families, relationships, businesses, ministry) that try to pull us away from the Lord, we have to be like Nehemiah and say we can’t come down, we are doing a great work for the Lord. We must keep going and stay focused, this is our destiny and our future. We must keep our priorities in order.


The Self-Saboteur:

We can sabotage our own visions, dreams, and relationships. Sometimes we can be our own worst enemy. Procrastination, unforgiveness, and brokenness can cloud our judgements and visions. We may tend to see the negative things in others and ourselves. We may possess a lack of self-worth, thinking we aren’t qualified, not smart enough, not good enough, not pretty enough and so on and so on. We struggle with fear, failure, and rejection. We should learn and except who God says we are, trust His word and daily make a step to become and be all that He says we are. When you like you, others will too.


An example of self- sabotage from the bible is Judas. Judas was one of the 12 disciples of Jesus. Just like the other disciples, he had power over unclean spirits, preached the word and healed the sick. Judas also was the ministry treasurer but he used his position for personal gain (John 12:6). He called Jesus Rabbi (teacher) instead of master like the other disciple suggesting that he saw his relationship with Jesus differently than the others did. Judas eventually betrayed Jesus for thirty pieces of silver (Matthew 26:14-16). John 13:2 tells us that Satan had already put this betrayal in Judas’ heart. He later had remorse (guilt) and tried to return the coins but the chief priests rejected it. He then threw the money, ran, and hang himself, yes, he committed suicide (Matthew 27:5). May we live a life worthy of the calling that God has placed inside of us (Ephesians 4:1) less we sabotage our own dreams and visions and destinies.


We can be either a victim of sabotage or a perpetrator of sabotage, so let us be mindful of our own position and purpose as well as the position and purpose of those whom we allow in our lives.


May you and your family have a blessed and Happy Thanksgiving as you cultivate healthy relationships with them and the Lord!






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